Elation
Door: Joris Timmermans
Blijf op de hoogte en volg Joris
25 Mei 2021 | Nederland, Oegstgeest
I feel free...! For the last one and a half months, I have been living with a tension, that has acted as electric voltage on my brain. Today however, on Tuesday the 26th, the day after Whit Monday, I have received heavenly news (at least to my ears), that has freed my heart and delighted my spirit.
It all started way back in 2008. At the time, I was working hard to earn my PhD at the international institute of geoinformation science and earth observation. It was already my 3rd year into my research, which (as any PhD student can confirm) is the time that people are becoming nervous, as it starts to dawn on the candidate that you have less than half of your time remaining to finish. I can honestly say that I too was worried in the autumn of that year, however not because of the reasons I just gave. No,.. the thing that frightened me, was the email laying unopened in my mailbox from the ESA regarding my application for the astronaut-vacancy. What could it say?, Did I pass the first selection round, or was I denied the opportunity to pursue my dream further.... Alas, it was the latter....
‘Unfortunately we hereby would like to inform you that you were not selected for the 2nd stage of the application-procedure”. It took a moment to sink in that I would not chase after Youri Gagarin, Neil Armstrong and Wubbo Ockels. It left me devastated and in doubt. Was my resume not good enough? Had my application-letter, failed to impress? Or (as I finally realized), did I make a terrible mistake in one of the many forms that I had to fill in. Naturally none of these questions was answered in ESA’s reply mail. However as time passed by, I realized that most probably the error was mine. Namely, I forgot to obtain a official ‘medical certification’, relying solely on a letter of my GP. While I had my reasons back then to do it this way (mainly to do with cost and ignorance), I promised myself that if I would again have in unlikely chance to become an astronaut, this was one of the first things I would arrange. ........
It is the 9th of February 2021, the day after the ESA has informed the world they are again opening astronaut-vacancies. I am on the phone with Sky Medical Center in Eindhoven keeping up a promise to myself done 12 years ago to get my Unrestricted Class-2 Medical Certificate. While the deadline for the applications has been set to the 28th May, I aim to have the certificate ready as soon as possible and urge the check-up to take place at the earliest convenience. What I did not know however is that I would fall spectacularly short of this aim. Not only would the date for the check-up (initially on march 4th), be postponed in total 5 times due to various reasons (one of which an infection with Corona) to the April 13th, the final conclusion of the examination would even take longer, due to some anomalous readings.
The examination itself is as straightforward as can be. It starts off by filling in a host of questions regarding your mental and physical health, occurrence of genetic afflictions in your family health history, and medicine & drug usage. Afterwards, several measurements are performed to estimate one’s long-capacity, blood pressure & oxygen concentration, heart-condition and kidney-functions. In truth, I expected the medical check’s to be much more severe. For instance, having a ECG while running on a treadmill for an hour, and the like. Basically, I was expecting Gattaca -levels of scrutiny, and instead received similar physical tests I have been accustomed to in my yearly physical check-up. Unfortunately, this was not the only thing where my expectations was different from reality.
With a vision of 160 (with glasses), a steady heart rate of around 70, a blood pressure of 120 over 80 and healthy long-function (irrespective of my asthma) all signs indicated a green light. However some irregularities were found in my urine-samples, turning the traffic light slightly orange. Together with the kidney-stone I had when I was on the Tibetan Plateau, this meant that no medical certificate could be provided yet. Instead further examination (under the care of my GP) had to be performed, to answer specific questions. Considering I have (apart from that episode in Tibet), never had any urological problems, this surprised me to now end and made sure that my trip back from Eindhoven was not as ‘celebratory’ as I first imagined it would be. Naturally, on arriving back home, I directly made an appointment with the GP to start the follow-up procedure to answer all open questions. But again things did not go as smoothly as I would like them to have gone...
First, upon entering the office of the physician, is was greeted with two new faces. The first face belonged to a new GP that just started working at my physician’s office, while the second person was a doctor-in-training trying to gain some experience. I had to contain my smile, as I tried to explain my strange and unusual situation. Indeed quickly enough the actual GP stepped in to take over the conversation.. Apparently facilitating a ‘wannabe-astronaut-applicant’ is not being educated these days in medical school ;-). Anyways, following the nice forms I was provided with (from Sky medical Center), we quickly realized that not only did I have to have my urine analysed (again), but also an ultrasound of my kidneys needed to be performed. Both however could be performed on short notice, so no worries there.. (yet).
Two weeks later in the end of April, I found myself visiting the GP (without the trainee surprisingly) again to discuss the results, only to realize that of the 2 urine tests only 1 was actually performed. Specifically, only my albumin-creatinine ratio (ACR) was determined. But not my protein-creatinine ratio (PCR), even though we explicitly had written this on the form to be included. In fact, it was this PCR-test that required a waiting period of 2 weeks. Doing the calculation already in my head, it would therefore be at least mid-May before I would receive the final conclusion... In addition, the ultrasound of my kidney-stones provided no definitive conclusion (if there were still stones in my kidneys), requiring me to get a CT-scan and visit the urologist at the earliest convenience. All of these setbacks slowly are turning my smile upside down. I am already envisioning that at least of these tests will cause me to fail the medical check-up completely...
And indeed when it rains,... it pours... I have 5 stones in my lower-kidneys, so the urologists tell me over the phone!!! My heart sinks to my knees. She goes on to say that according to the aforementioned flowchart (of which I provided a scan), this means that these have to first be removed before a class 1 medical certificate. And of course, she highlights the (too) little time remaining between today (Friday the 14th) and the 28th of May, to schedule such a procedure. I am so devastated. I even can`t bring up the courage to tell Ingrid as I am afraid I would break down and start crying. Or it might be that possibly even though it would be illogical I would like to reserve that tiny bit of hope that my dream is not offer yet..... So I say to her that the urologists has send her results directly to the GP and that I will discuss it with him, when we get the other urine-tests back from the lab.
And so on Wednesday May 19th I again enter the office of the GP, where we first discuss the results of the urologist ‘... 5 kidney-stones... in the lower part of the kidneys....no class 1... ’ The sentences hit me like bullets, but also, they seem to bounce of my skin without leaving a trace!!! Somewhere in the back of my mind, something connects! I quickly reach for the now infamous flowchart and upon again examining it, my heart does a summersault... How could I have been so blind!!!... I don`t need a class 1 certificate (at this moment). That is only for commercial pilots! I need a class-2 version, for which kidney stones are allowed, unless they are (stuck) in the ureter. As mine are located nowhere near this, it should be fine. Naturally, I still need the last urine-test to provide positive results. To my great anxiety however the GP indicates that he so far has not received any result yet... ‘Could it be that again the lab has failed to comply with our request and forgotten to run the test?’ Reinvigorated I urge the GP to starting dialling phone numbers and see if maybe, just possibly, somewhere somebody has my results. Even when the first calls to the lab provide negative answers (and specify to again take the test and wait), we continue. And finally (with only one number left on the list) we get in contact with lab that has my result.. No idea why it took so long, No idea why they did not send the result, No idea who he/she is,.. but the result is positive: no protein found in my urine!!!
Today I have heard that my ‘Medical’ is send to me... And so come’s to an end, a period of waiting/ despairing and hoping.. mostly hoping... It has been a race against the clock (which ‘accidently’ also has postponed the deadline for application to 2021 June 18th, and I feel free to dream again..
It all started way back in 2008. At the time, I was working hard to earn my PhD at the international institute of geoinformation science and earth observation. It was already my 3rd year into my research, which (as any PhD student can confirm) is the time that people are becoming nervous, as it starts to dawn on the candidate that you have less than half of your time remaining to finish. I can honestly say that I too was worried in the autumn of that year, however not because of the reasons I just gave. No,.. the thing that frightened me, was the email laying unopened in my mailbox from the ESA regarding my application for the astronaut-vacancy. What could it say?, Did I pass the first selection round, or was I denied the opportunity to pursue my dream further.... Alas, it was the latter....
‘Unfortunately we hereby would like to inform you that you were not selected for the 2nd stage of the application-procedure”. It took a moment to sink in that I would not chase after Youri Gagarin, Neil Armstrong and Wubbo Ockels. It left me devastated and in doubt. Was my resume not good enough? Had my application-letter, failed to impress? Or (as I finally realized), did I make a terrible mistake in one of the many forms that I had to fill in. Naturally none of these questions was answered in ESA’s reply mail. However as time passed by, I realized that most probably the error was mine. Namely, I forgot to obtain a official ‘medical certification’, relying solely on a letter of my GP. While I had my reasons back then to do it this way (mainly to do with cost and ignorance), I promised myself that if I would again have in unlikely chance to become an astronaut, this was one of the first things I would arrange. ........
It is the 9th of February 2021, the day after the ESA has informed the world they are again opening astronaut-vacancies. I am on the phone with Sky Medical Center in Eindhoven keeping up a promise to myself done 12 years ago to get my Unrestricted Class-2 Medical Certificate. While the deadline for the applications has been set to the 28th May, I aim to have the certificate ready as soon as possible and urge the check-up to take place at the earliest convenience. What I did not know however is that I would fall spectacularly short of this aim. Not only would the date for the check-up (initially on march 4th), be postponed in total 5 times due to various reasons (one of which an infection with Corona) to the April 13th, the final conclusion of the examination would even take longer, due to some anomalous readings.
The examination itself is as straightforward as can be. It starts off by filling in a host of questions regarding your mental and physical health, occurrence of genetic afflictions in your family health history, and medicine & drug usage. Afterwards, several measurements are performed to estimate one’s long-capacity, blood pressure & oxygen concentration, heart-condition and kidney-functions. In truth, I expected the medical check’s to be much more severe. For instance, having a ECG while running on a treadmill for an hour, and the like. Basically, I was expecting Gattaca -levels of scrutiny, and instead received similar physical tests I have been accustomed to in my yearly physical check-up. Unfortunately, this was not the only thing where my expectations was different from reality.
With a vision of 160 (with glasses), a steady heart rate of around 70, a blood pressure of 120 over 80 and healthy long-function (irrespective of my asthma) all signs indicated a green light. However some irregularities were found in my urine-samples, turning the traffic light slightly orange. Together with the kidney-stone I had when I was on the Tibetan Plateau, this meant that no medical certificate could be provided yet. Instead further examination (under the care of my GP) had to be performed, to answer specific questions. Considering I have (apart from that episode in Tibet), never had any urological problems, this surprised me to now end and made sure that my trip back from Eindhoven was not as ‘celebratory’ as I first imagined it would be. Naturally, on arriving back home, I directly made an appointment with the GP to start the follow-up procedure to answer all open questions. But again things did not go as smoothly as I would like them to have gone...
First, upon entering the office of the physician, is was greeted with two new faces. The first face belonged to a new GP that just started working at my physician’s office, while the second person was a doctor-in-training trying to gain some experience. I had to contain my smile, as I tried to explain my strange and unusual situation. Indeed quickly enough the actual GP stepped in to take over the conversation.. Apparently facilitating a ‘wannabe-astronaut-applicant’ is not being educated these days in medical school ;-). Anyways, following the nice forms I was provided with (from Sky medical Center), we quickly realized that not only did I have to have my urine analysed (again), but also an ultrasound of my kidneys needed to be performed. Both however could be performed on short notice, so no worries there.. (yet).
Two weeks later in the end of April, I found myself visiting the GP (without the trainee surprisingly) again to discuss the results, only to realize that of the 2 urine tests only 1 was actually performed. Specifically, only my albumin-creatinine ratio (ACR) was determined. But not my protein-creatinine ratio (PCR), even though we explicitly had written this on the form to be included. In fact, it was this PCR-test that required a waiting period of 2 weeks. Doing the calculation already in my head, it would therefore be at least mid-May before I would receive the final conclusion... In addition, the ultrasound of my kidney-stones provided no definitive conclusion (if there were still stones in my kidneys), requiring me to get a CT-scan and visit the urologist at the earliest convenience. All of these setbacks slowly are turning my smile upside down. I am already envisioning that at least of these tests will cause me to fail the medical check-up completely...
And indeed when it rains,... it pours... I have 5 stones in my lower-kidneys, so the urologists tell me over the phone!!! My heart sinks to my knees. She goes on to say that according to the aforementioned flowchart (of which I provided a scan), this means that these have to first be removed before a class 1 medical certificate. And of course, she highlights the (too) little time remaining between today (Friday the 14th) and the 28th of May, to schedule such a procedure. I am so devastated. I even can`t bring up the courage to tell Ingrid as I am afraid I would break down and start crying. Or it might be that possibly even though it would be illogical I would like to reserve that tiny bit of hope that my dream is not offer yet..... So I say to her that the urologists has send her results directly to the GP and that I will discuss it with him, when we get the other urine-tests back from the lab.
And so on Wednesday May 19th I again enter the office of the GP, where we first discuss the results of the urologist ‘... 5 kidney-stones... in the lower part of the kidneys....no class 1... ’ The sentences hit me like bullets, but also, they seem to bounce of my skin without leaving a trace!!! Somewhere in the back of my mind, something connects! I quickly reach for the now infamous flowchart and upon again examining it, my heart does a summersault... How could I have been so blind!!!... I don`t need a class 1 certificate (at this moment). That is only for commercial pilots! I need a class-2 version, for which kidney stones are allowed, unless they are (stuck) in the ureter. As mine are located nowhere near this, it should be fine. Naturally, I still need the last urine-test to provide positive results. To my great anxiety however the GP indicates that he so far has not received any result yet... ‘Could it be that again the lab has failed to comply with our request and forgotten to run the test?’ Reinvigorated I urge the GP to starting dialling phone numbers and see if maybe, just possibly, somewhere somebody has my results. Even when the first calls to the lab provide negative answers (and specify to again take the test and wait), we continue. And finally (with only one number left on the list) we get in contact with lab that has my result.. No idea why it took so long, No idea why they did not send the result, No idea who he/she is,.. but the result is positive: no protein found in my urine!!!
Today I have heard that my ‘Medical’ is send to me... And so come’s to an end, a period of waiting/ despairing and hoping.. mostly hoping... It has been a race against the clock (which ‘accidently’ also has postponed the deadline for application to 2021 June 18th, and I feel free to dream again..
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